May Update for 2019

 "But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint."  Isaiah 40:31



This has been my "go to" verse, since high school.  I thought I knew what it meant then, but now I know even more.  It's assurance.  It's encouragement.  It's telling me to be still more often - and wait on the Lord.  I tend to run ahead and try to figure it ALL out.  I want to make a way or at least know the way.  I get terrible headaches rolling things around in my head.  And I have had to work really hard to remember HE is in charge - not me.  I am not.  He is.  What wonderful news to remember.

I have not been able to write.  It is slowly coming back.  I have been in survival mode and trying to do all of the things I mentioned in March.  Now it's almost June, and I am still struggling to get by most days.  But God promised He would not leave me.  And I keep praying.  A lot.

Andrew continues to do well physically.  He is running and working and has not had any seizures!  We are well past the six month mark!  He is still looking at grad school in the fall and continues to plan.  I have stepped way back and try not to help unless he asks me.  I don't think I have been an overbearing mother, but he had to depend on me longer than most; so he is enjoying his independence, and I am getting used to it.  I pray for him more than ever - really, for all my boys.

Peter and Will continue to work.  We don't see either of them nearly enough, even though Will still lives here, but we have fun when we are together.  And I love and appreciate them more than they know.  Right now, Peter is fun but a voice of reason and understanding to me.  And Will is mostly fun and comic relief when I really really need it.  

Sam graduates soon from Hardin Park.  He has grown even more, since I posted in March.  We were able to go to Disney World and Sea World on a short trip a few weeks ago.  It all started when Cindy wanted to take Karen to Sea World on a special vacation (I know some of you don't know who these family and friends are, but that is okay!).  I told her I was in if we could go to Disney World too - since I wanted to take Sam - and she and Karen worked there in college.  So we added Whitney (and tried to add another, but she could not go!) and took off!  We pooled all of our gift cards, bonus points, and birthday money and had a very wonderful few days for a very little cost.  The resort where we stayed could not have been nicer - the people and the place.  We had a wheelchair, and people could not have been more accommodating.  I would have handed out a hundred awards for people who helped us in so many ways at the parks, gas stations, restaurants, etc.  And I would have only given out two or three complaints.  Sam was a huge help, and he had a wonderful time, despite some diabetes issues.  We had help from our own doctor and nurse and friends.  God provides even when things we think are in place fail.  And really, it gives us a chance to see Him work.  He has done it for my family in many ways that I've seen and tons more that I haven't.

We have continued to help my parents with their downsizing.  It's so wonderful to lighten the load.  And I continue to do that, even though it's taking forever it seems, at my own home.  Their home has had quite a few things changed - floors, walls, etc.  And I was quite insistent that they needed an island in their kitchen.  It came last week, and it looks beautiful and will make storage so much easier for my mom.  I'm so glad they listened to my idea!  That was my only one.  But one level living is so much easier on both of them, and we are thankful they are settling in well.

Pete is preaching a revival tonight.  And I am still at home writing this.  I'll have to tell him how James does on Jeopardy!  We have wonderful help coming to our home almost every day now - except for Fridays and Sundays.  It has been such a blessing to have help with Sarah - for her too.  We are still just trying to keep things safe and calm.  And one night, I could not get two of the boys where they needed to be and be at home.  And that night we found out we cannot be gone - just like that everything changed again.  So we are so very thankful for those who recommended extra special help.  And we are getting more soon, as things get worse.  I don't go to church very often at all, and I was offered a name tag not long ago.  But I did get to go at Easter and Mother's Day.  And it's no fun, when that's the only time you can go!

So I was thinking about people who only go at Christmas and Easter but COULD go the rest of the time but choose not to.  It's easy to find things to do on Sunday morning.  It's like bonus time!  But I also feel very depleted, because I don't have what I get at church.  It's more than the singing.  It's more than the sermon or the interaction with others.  It's ALL of of it.  And I cannot wait to get back.  We are praying about it, because I don't want someone else to have to miss so that I can go.  So I listened to Greg Laurie this week during church time.

This is a quick - but not short - update.  I feel the burden lifting some, and I think that is why I could write.  I have talked to God a lot about my burdens, and I am having trouble just laying some down.  And I know He knows.  And the home situation is wearing at best.  And I can see where He is working in all of that.  

I will update again, but we appreciate all of those who pray for our family.  And I wanted you to know we are still here and praising Him still.  We praise Him for who He is AND for all He has done.  And that "all"  should be ALL ~ because giving us salvation through Jesus Christ was enough.  And He still walks with us in our time here.  I hope in all of the real struggles I share, that I make it clear that He is always here and always provides.  I can do nothing without Him.  And I want others to see that He is there to help them too.  And then maybe they will accept His gift of salvation through Jesus. 

Pete said that God has laid it on his heart to preach the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  Jesus came as a man, lived a perfect and sinless life, died on the cross for our sins, and ROSE from the dead.  That is the Gospel - the good news, the best news ever.  All we have to do is believe it and accept the gift.

We can accept His gift of salvation by believing that we sinned and are in need of a Savior; and Jesus is the ONLY One who can save us.  I hope you have found forgiveness and peace in Jesus.  It's the only way I get through.  I still have a tough time, because I live in a fallen world.  But no matter what, I have the hope that only comes in knowing Jesus.

Thanks for reading.  And thanks for praying for our family.