Last Race of the Season

The Last Race of this Season

Andrew just finished his outdoor track season.  His last race was Friday – Good Friday – in Charlotte.  Thankful for the GPS that got me there, and, more importantly, showed me the way out in pouring rain!  It was a tough race to watch.  He was going for a PR.  We are thankful for the bests he has had in the 3000 and 5000 this year.  He had a slight knee injury and did a lot of pool running.  He also had some respiratory illness that we cannot seem to stop even when we watch and know it’s probably coming!  But as his mom, I wanted this last race to be the best.  After the first couple of laps, it was obvious it would not be.  His arms were stretched out far pulling his legs along – legs that just would not cooperate.  Thankfully, Andrew just knew it was a tough race and kept on going.  He was disappointed but had a great attitude about it.  His time was not his best, but it was not terrible either.  I told him later that he had no idea what it took for him to run that race like that and that I appreciated that about him.  He just smiled and told me thanks.

 It was pouring rain, and I would not have wanted to be anywhere else.  Just before he started, a dear friend slipped down the bleachers and stood beside me and prayed and yelled and encouraged while Andrew ran.  She is a mother too, and a nurse.  She could sense what he needed – what I needed – and her presence was very timely and appreciated.  We were also able to talk about what I could see in his running.  She is a nurse who has “counseled” me a lot through Sam’s diagnosis and treatment of his diabetes and other things, so she is a treasure and a gift.  At least I have some words (medical terms) to start asking with when I check on his legs…again.

I have gone back and read some of my earlier posts and like the ones that are not negative.  I can remember how I felt writing some, and then I wonder how I felt writing others.  I think my heart is leaning more towards thankful – even though so many thing still seem unsettled.  Maybe I am adjusting to being in this waiting room of life – where I can truly put down the worry and let God handle it.

Just last night, I cried as I told Pete one of my deepest fears and frustrations.  It’s not a secret, but rarely do I speak it out loud.  And of course it affects one of my children and my concerns for his future.  I have worried about his future years ahead of time and every step of the way.  I know I have to keep turning him over.  And I do.  It’s taking it all back that I need to try harder to keep from doing!

We have been studying Joshua in Sunday School and took a quick break to have an Easter study the week before Easter.  With Joshua, we find all of the promises that God is with us and not to be afraid or discouraged.  The promises assure us that He goes before us.  (Deut. 31:6, 8, Joshua 1:9 are just a couple).  Then we studied and talked about what God did for us.  As I read something from a book, I got so emotional, I could hardly talk (much to the dismay of my children who were in the class!).  But thinking about the night right before Jesus was arrested and how much He endured for us, I think an emotional response was the only response because I was really thinking about what I was reading.  I had read it before so I had already pondered it, but the stark reality of what He did just rose up and hit me.  What a blessing. 

So days can be hard, for many reasons.  But I can choose to be thankful and trusting and faithful.  And I need to remember to do that always in every situation. 

Andrew will take a little break and then train for cross country in the fall. 

The other boys are good.  Sam has had some little illnesses off and on.  I read his doctor report from cardiology and let the thankfulness just flood me.  I did not take that report for granted. 

We are looking forward to Peter being home soon.  And Will is still busy outside doing whatever he can.  I am thankful for the days he is not climbing trees and pray harder on the days when I know he is. 

Thanks again for praying.  We feel it and appreciate it!

 

 

Quick Update!

Today is my grandmother’s 89th birthday!  I am very thankful for her.  We are celebrating at her house in Abingdon tomorrow from 4-6 if anyone wants to stop by!  First, we have the MS Walk at Sugar Hollow.  We are walking on my mom’s team in support of her and so many other friends who live with MS every day.

I am also thankful today for a very good (great, actually) visit to the pediatric cardiologist with Sam.  The story is quick but has a lot of twists and turns, but the outcome is wonderful.  We don’t have to worry about his new heart murmur, and we don’t have to go back.  The doctor was great and so good with Sam.  He knew what he was doing, and I watched as he made sure Sam’s heart was pumping as it should.  His EKG was normal.  He told Sam he has a great heart, and Sam beamed.  He really liked the doctor and talked about him a lot after we left.  We are glad to be home and watch the new episode of Shark Tank tonight with that burden fully lifted!  Thanks to those of you who prayed.  Not many knew, but I know they prayed.

We actually found this when Sam was at our pediatrician last week sick.  He was sick again this week and has missed most of the last two weeks of school for snow or illness.  But he cannot go with a fever or strep.  My boys never run fevers, but two have been doing exactly that lately!

Andrew is sick again.  He ran such a great 5000 at Wake Forest, and then his knee hurt after a good workout the next week.  He has been running in the pool but has been outside the last couple of days feeling much better.   In the meantime, he ran a slight fever and ended up with bronchitis but seems to look much better than he did a couple of days ago!

We are looking forward to spring and prettier weather.  Winter is great, but we are excited to be outside without boots and coats!

Thanks to all of you who pray.  We hope Andrew will just pick up where he left off with his PR and jump right back in.  Spring is always hard for him – it has been the last several years.

Thanks again!  Have a great weekend!

Love,
Wendi


P.S.  If you need a great new CD, my aunt got one for me at Lifeway that is Easter with different artists.  I am so glad Easter is later this year – more time to reflect and celebrate and think.  Of course, it’s good to do that all year, but Easter is such a special time.  #8 is my favorite right now – Kari Jobe’s “What Love is This” – you can google it too!

Happy Birthday to...my Grandmother!

How can she be turning 89 on April 4th - this Friday?  She does not look a day over 65 - which goes well with my aunt who is stuck at 32 in my mind.  I tell her I passed her in age a long long time ago!

As I think back to my childhood, I remember people laughing when I told them I had "lots" of grandparents. But I did.  I had grandparents and great-grandparents.  I was so fortunate to grow up with lots of people to love me.  I have lost all of them except my grandmother.  We have always called her Grandmother.

I remember riding on the bus or taking a taxi from downtown Bristol to the Cameo or Paramount to see a movie when we spent the night with Grandmother.  She did not drive, so going somewhere with her was very exciting indeed.  Sometimes we walked places.  She lived in town near Krispy Kreme.  But better than Krispy Kreme were The Giant doughnuts that my mom got sometimes on our way to Grandmother's house.  What a treat!  Anyway, fun was somehow linked to Grandmother.  We saw movies that had Dick Van Dyke or Don Knotts in them.  I remember one was The Apple Dumpling Gang.

As I grew up, I appreciated the compliments and encouragement that came from Grandmother.  As I got older, my appreciation grew even more.  Grandmother and I share a love for Christian fiction.  She was the one I called a few years ago when I saw Beverly Lewis in person at Lifeway in Chattanooga while traveling for work.  She was happy to find out she is much prettier in person than on her book covers!  Grandmother and I do NOT share a love for "Murder, She Wrote", my favorite TV show of all time.  I think maybe she was hung up on something about Angela Lansbury's earlier works and not Jessica Fletcher (who, by the way, writes fiction and does not drive either!).  That is definitely one thing I cannot figure out!

I called Grandmother the time Pete flew to Texas, and my house almost flew apart hours after he left!  I had a water pipe burst, my furnace messed up, my car battery died, a blizzard was coming, and I was almost out of milk!  Just one of those days with three very small boys - who thought stamping in the water puddles in the dining room seemed like fun while Mommy frantically searched for the switch to turn off the water.  Fortunately, one of our good friends knew where to tell me to go in the basement; and his phone number did not contain a "4" which decided not to work on my phone on that same day.  The plumber came.  My brother came.  All was set to rights.  Grandmother laughed with me and told me it sounded like "Little House on the Prairie."  We laughed about all of the things that went wrong and how they were made right.  It's important to give credit to God, because we know He was behind all of the fixing!

A few years later, I called Grandmother to tell her about one of the boys and his medical problems.  I told her I felt more like "Marcus Welby, MD" than "Little House" - she agreed, and we were still able to laugh.

We had a great Christian Book Warehouse in Bristol, so I got Grandmother gift cards there for Christmas.  Then I would try to come over and take her to shop myself.  Once, the lady at the cash register (who had struck me as someone who maybe should not be left alone at the cash register) took Grandmother's card that still had a lot of money on it to throw away - instead of the empty one.  Don't ask me, but we thought THAT was funny too!  But we were happy we caught the mistake.  Those cards were like gold to Grandmother.

I have other funny stories, some even more recent, but I cannot share them in case they would get Grandmother in trouble!  She likes to do a lot - she probably shouldn't - at her age.

A huge blessing last year was her hip surgery.  She had been in pain for months and months.  I told her, when I found out she was having surgery, that I did not think they would do hip surgery on an 88 year old woman if they did not think it would help.  Too much risk.  She had a great doctor and came through surgery better than most people who are much younger.  She woke up without the pain that plagued her for many months.  I felt like a gift had been given back - not just to her but to us as well.  Sam and I went to check on her, and he talked to her more than he ever had.  It was fun to see the delight on her face as she listened to the quiet little boy talk.

Grandmother has always been encouraging to me.  She tells me things that others don't - things that give me a different perspective and make me appreciate my family more.  My brother once called her the glue that holds our family together.  She certainly is!

She has had some serious illnesses in the past and has overcome them and kept on going.  She has so many great stories to tell.  And sad ones too.  I know she shakes some because her left hand was tied back when she was in school so she would use her right hand.  Sam is left handed - as is my sister.  She also will pull up her face a little to give me a better look at  her dimples - which Sam has too.  She tells of her brother using dish detergent instead of hair oil getting ready for a date and then seeing bubbles form on his head as he walked through the rain.  We laugh and giggle.

Last fall, driving back alone from a cross country meet in Raleigh, I listened as Grandmother told me how she rolled over to sit up in bed because she hurt so badly in the morning.  A little bird walked by her bed.  It stopped and looked at her and kept on walking.  She said she shook her head and rubbed her eyes, but there really was a little bird!  We laughed until we cried.  Hearing how my dad came and got the bird (safely) out was quite another story!  What a treat for me.

What a blessing to have my Grandmother.  What a blessing to have had her here for 89 years.  It's good to know she is there.  I cannot wait to share my new Robert Whitlow book with her that is pre-ordered, or was that an Amish fiction author?

I know she is a blessing to the rest of the family too.  My sister has her own book of stories.  She has ongoing jokes with two of her daughters where strange things end up in their houses.  It's kind of like the rug my brother and sister pass back and forth.  It's so good to laugh and make others laugh.

We love you, Grandmother, so much!  Happy 89th Birthday!  (Even though you don't look nearly old enough to be having such a birthday!!!!)

It got here!

It got here!

I meant to update before.  Sam has strep again, and he felt really bad yesterday and the day before.  This weekend, I was so heartbroken to find out one of my friends lost her brother to diabetes complications.  I have been waking up in the middle of the night to check Sam.  We do that when he is off or sick, but waking up to find something has happened during the night is one of my worst fears with Sam.  Sunday, I was in a good place when I left church.  But then I got the news about my friend’s brother.  And to top that off, the devil took away my credit card and ability to write checks for the rest of the day while I tried to get ready for school and snow!  The bank stuff was the regular safety stuff, but the problems  were not connected; so that is how I know it really was the devil trying to get me.  I cut my errands short and was thankful to get home with what I needed (and I saw God’s provision there too!).

I wanted to write a message about Andrew getting his medicine, but it was so negative.  We had to work so hard to get it.  I mean, really?  He has insurance.  Always has.  I had people offering to raise money to pay for a dose, since he was getting sick and missed his first indoor meet.  He had lost a few pounds, and that is in the top five of things that can freak me out about Andrew.  I always think maybe something is going on that we don’t know yet.  It’s not being paranoid, but it’s just trying to be responsible.  I have shared with you before that I asked God to show me (knock me over the head) anything that needed to be checked.  This happened when Andrew was five, and I remember asking Him – very clearly.  Andrew finally did get his medicine (after many people worked on a seemingly impossible task) and has had two infusions.  We will check his numbers again after I check with his doctor.  He is doing much better and feeling much better.  We are so thankful he has his medicine finally, and I am sorry for what it may have cost him to wait and go without.  But God sees the whole picture, and I don’t.  So my attitude has improved, and Pete is glad I did not have to travel anywhere to talk to someone at the insurance company in person.  After calling the insurance company once again today about a letter in the mail, I was told they don’t know how his stuff is straight – because the rest of our stuff is still a mess.  While at first I was annoyed, I see now that God worked it out for Andrew – who needed it.  And then He let me see it today.  That has helped my attitude and my perspective.  I know He will help me get the other worked out.

With all of the snow and sickness and cold and dreary days, it’s easy to get down.  I am fighting that by trying to look at all of my blessings.  They are truly more than I can count.  I don’t mind cold and snow.  I do mind a cold and dreary attitude.  I don’t think that is what God has for me.  But it’s good to feel what others feel sometimes and try to learn from it whatever we can.

When we talked in Sunday School this week, I was reminded that it’s okay to be somewhere in our lives where we don’t want to be or don’t want to be very long.  It’s the waiting room – as I call it.  If I just knew how long or how it would end up, it would be easier.  That is where faith comes in.  When I get weary, I get anxious.  God tells me not to be anxious for anything – He will take care of me (Philippians 4:6).
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”  Philippians 4:6

That’s for me.  Pray.  Ask.  Be thankful.  But don’t be anxious.

I have been awakened by a shake of my shoulder. And I found my child not responsive on the floor in his room in the middle of the night.  (And that is not the first time I was compelled to check on him and find him in a place where he needed us.)  I have been comforted by a hand on my shoulder – at least a couple of times.  I know Who it was.  I know Who it is.  I have no doubts.  That’s what I strive to remember.  I get caught up in the frustration and fears.  That is human.  But because I know Him, I can remember He is with me.

Google this song if you need a new great song.  It’s great for running or walking or singing in the car at the top of your lungs.  It’s a great reminder.  Come just as we are.  He takes me when I am mean, scared, frustrated, brokenhearted, impatient, selfish, feeling sorry for myself, and all of the other things.  Thank you for praying for my family.


“Come However You Are”   City Harbour


To anyone walking down a hard road
Worn out with blisters on your feet
To anyone with a heart that's shattered
Doing your best to hold it together
With no prayer to pray and no song left to sing

Whatever pain you're dealing with
Let me offer this

Come however you are
Come with all your heart breaks
Come with all the mistakes you've made
Lay them down at the cross
Give them to the God who loves you
Hurt, scarred, falling apart
Come however you are

To the girl who never had a father
To the guy who thinks he'll never
Amount to much of anything
To those of us who feel unwanted, unneeded, Unloved and desperately incomplete

Come however you are
Come with all your heart breaks
Come with all the mistakes you've made
Lay them down at the cross
Give them to the God who loves you
Hurt, scarred, falling apart
Come however you are

Come with your regrets
Come with the things you can't take
Come with all your fears and all your shame
With everything
Come with the pieces of
Your bruised and broken heart
Don't wait, don't wait

Whatever pain you're dealing with
Let me offer this

Come however you are
Come with all your heart breaks
Come with all the mistakes you've made
Lay them down at the cross
Give them to the God who loves you
Hurt, scarred, falling apart
Come however you are

Come however you
Come however you are
Come however you
Come however you are
Come however you
Come however you are
Come however you are

The Graveside Visit

The Graveside Visit        

One of the best visits I had at Christmas was at the grave site of little Katelyn.  I think of Katelyn all year.  I think of her especially on her birthday, November 20 (1991) and on the day she died, Christmas Day (1991).  I try to visit her grave on Christmas Eve.  It is a time to slow down and stop and remember and reflect.  It’s a time to tell her I know she is not there.  It’s a time to cry and remember what is important while we are here on this earth.  My nephew had made his sister a wreath shaped like a cross.  I have seen square wreaths and letter wreaths but not a cross.  I could see where some other special people had remembered Katelyn too and left things there for her.  I had just brought myself, and Pete.

Part of that reminder is that the important things are not hustle and bustle, even though some of us try to do that to have a meaningful Christmas and not just for the craziness of it all.  It reminds me that things are not important.  The visit reminds me that it’s okay if I did not do everything I set out to do.  I have all year to be thoughtful and kind.  I don’t have to rush around and make myself and others miserable.

Visiting Katelyn’s grave reminds me that my family is so very important.  My friends.  All of them.  We just never know when we will not have more time with them here. 

I still did not get to see everyone I wished I could see on Christmas Eve.  I did not get to go to all of the homes and visit all of the loved ones I wished I could.  Sometimes my dad and I would visit eight to ten homes in one swoop.  Other Christmas Eves we stopped after a few because of something that happened.  Once I got to spend several hours alone with someone when the family had a medical emergency during our visit.  It was a sweet sweet time, though unexpected.  And when my sister joined us later, she was able to share it too. 

Above Katelyn’s grave is the one of my great grandfather.  He was my grandfather’s stepfather.  My grandfather’s father was killed in the coal mines when my grandfather was a little boy, the oldest of three.  During the Great Depression, my grandfather helped support his family that included his stepfather and new little brother.  My great grandfather loved my sister.  He loved me too, but she was very special to him.  So it is very fitting that her first little baby is buried right near him.  

Next to him is my great grandmother.  She always made sure I got in the front of the line when tons of family lined up in her small kitchen to make sure I got mashed potatoes.  She made the best, and she knew that was probably all I would eat!   It’s so unreal to see on her stone that she was born in 1899!

Next to my great grandparents are my paternal grandparents.  My grandmother died soon after my great grandmother did in 1996.  Peter was just a baby.  She had battled cancer a few times, and the last time she was home for about a year before she died.  We spent time together in a blizzard after my great grandmother’s funeral.  My grandmother said she wished she could join her in Heaven soon, and she did – at Easter time.  We talked that day, and I read the Bible to her.  It was a special time. 

My grandfather lived several years longer.  He was the most generous man.  He worked hard all of his life.  And he would do anything for us.  I remember him telling me through tears that he prayed for Andrew every night, after Andrew started getting illnesses.  He also liked to always try to slip me a $100 bill.   My mom told me to take it sometimes – it was his way of helping.  He died after suffering two aneurysms.  I stayed with him a lot in the hospital during what was supposed to be a girls’ weekend.  I remember getting to the hospital and seeing him after my brother called.  My brother-in-law took me to eat and filled me in.  When the family went to church Sunday, I spent that time alone with him.  We had gone through photo albums, and I told him stories of all of the great grandchildren.  Some of his dear friends, one a Virginia delegate, came to visit him on their way to church.  He was a much loved man who did more than we will ever know.  I still picked up the phone to call him at special times even years after he was gone. 

Even though it is sad when I miss them, I also realize how very blessed I have been in my life.  I still am very blessed with the family and friends God has given to me.  He has put so many wonderful people in my life.  To me, it’s amazing just how many there are.

The best part about the visit is knowing I will see them again.  And when I lose someone else, I know I will see them again if they go to Heaven.  There is an urgency to tell people and point them in that direction.  I feel it more and more as I get older.  I hope this year to be a better step for people to send them in the right direction so they can know the saving grace of my Savior. 

Merry Christmas From Our Family!

Merry Christmas from Our Family!

As I sit here on a cold Saturday morning in Boone, I am listening to the soft tapping of sleet and hoping Peter gets back safely from his run on campus.  I have two hunters in Virginia, but I hesitate to call them as they will be watching for deer.  My other two are probably being spoiled in Virginia.  I cannot wait to have everyone home tonight!

I spent many hours working on my Christmas cards last night.  If you don't get one and want one, please email me your address.  I have a huge list, but I don't have everyone on there I know.  It's vandenbergwj@charter.net.  I love to send Christmas cards, maybe because I love getting them!  As my list has grown over the years, I cannot put a personal message in each; so I have resigned myself to the picture card.  In my haste to get them printed this year, I only had a picture and Merry Christmas.  My sister took the picture at the beach this summer when we celebrated my parents' 50th wedding anniversary.  My parents eloped and were married in Boone on King Street at First Baptist Church.  They came over from Abingdon, VA.  How funny that I ended up living here, and that our family has so many ties to Boone and Appalachian.

I love reading Christmas letters.  I sometimes wish we could have done more ourselves throughout the year.  I sometimes wish my year had been like someone else's.  But I think as I get older, I appreciate more and more what HE has for me.  Just me.  Sometimes I am happy to get through a day.  And that is enough.  And I have some people that I don't know that I follow on a blog, and they help my perspective.  And then I have a lot of people that I DO know, and they help my perspective.

In one conversation earlier this year, I said to someone that I had become someone no one wished to be.  That was an honest feeling, but it was also a revelation to me.  Do I want to be the person whose life seems so perfect that everyone wished they could be like me? But the real revelation is that that is not me and not what I should strive for.  I want to be that person who cannot do things on her own, and that makes it easier for people to see what God does in my life.

 I sit here with tears in my eyes thinking of a lot (I cannot even begin to remember all right now) of the precious reminders God gives me through the people He surrounds me with.  And some of you don't even know!  When God uses you, you don't always know it.  So please don't ever give up doing His work, because it reaps benefits.  It either keeps someone like me going, or it points another to His way.

Psalm 56:8 says that God has recorded all of my wanderings and put all of my tears in a bottle.  The rest of this Psalm is about David trusting in God, and he was not afraid of what man would do to him.  I know God sees me at my worst - when I am mean, when I am sad, when I am frustrated, when I want to give up, when I wonder, when I just want things the way I want them!  But I know God cares about every single tear I cry.  He cares about all of my hopes and all of my crushed dreams.  And He loves me more than I can imagine.

Which brings us to Christmas.  So much of my life is survival upon this earth.  But when we leave, where will we go?  If we know, we can have no fear.  A way was made for us by the ONLY Son of God.  When Jesus was born, he bridged the gap sin placed between us and eternal life with God.  All we have to do is believe Jesus is the Son of God and that He died on the cross for our sins - being the only perfect sacrifice (John 3:16 and John 14:6).  And then we know where we will go.  We have peace about that.  We want to share with others. This is why I celebrate Christmas, the birth of my King, my Savior, my Lord, the One Who loves me the most.

Recently, something scary happened.  And I heard Pete remark to someone that the person with the emergency knew where he was going when he died.  And though it is still awful and scary, what a difference that is.  If he had died, he would be with Jesus.  And he knows it.

****************

Just a quick update on our family:

Pete was called into the ministry earlier this year.  He is under the watch care of our own church.  He has already been teaching Sunday School for a long time and has added some preaching to his list.  We were sad that he participated in his first funeral recently for a dear woman who sat in front of us in church since the boys were little.  She never moved.  She was such a blessing, and we miss her; but it was so peaceful to see someone nearing her life's end who looked forward to seeing her Savior.  She did not talk much about herself but always steered conversations to Jesus.  Pete has been to the Holy Land twice this year and still loves that trip.

Andrew is a sophomore at Appalachian and runs on the varsity cross country team.  He works hard to make great grades and helps clean with Pete or keeps Sam to earn some extra money.  He continues on his infusion therapy once a week and has not had many respiratory illnesses this year.  We still continue to try to find other things to help keep him healthy, and he has a great attitude and great determination.

Peter is a freshman at Appalachian and lives in his dad's old residence hall.  He works on campus part-time and is greeted by a very happy blond boy with glasses when he makes it home.  He recently came to eat dinner with a few of his friends, and Sam was on Cloud 9 having him here.  He is running a little here and there and keeps very busy on campus.  I offer to wash his clothes, but I think he really likes doing his own laundry at school!  He still plans on majoring in business - where his dad was.

Will is a junior at Watauga High School.  He ran cross country this fall and has been busy hunting since the season began.  He has started putting up crown molding in our den and is going to make a new mantle for me soon.  He still bikes and rides whatever he can get on.  He is my worker who is always into something.  Sam just said recently that he wished Will was his twin so they could go to school together and be in the same class.

Sam is in the third grade.  He still has difficulties reading but is on a good track this year.  His diabetes is about the same, and he is very cooperative with his constant care.  He will bring an apple and his insulin pen, resigning himself to a shot when he wants to eat!  He checks his own blood sugar at school and gets everyone moving quickly when he gets low.  We are so thankful that he is around people who love him and care for him while he is at school!  He still loves Legos and Playmobil and spends hours in his room setting up scenes or putting new sets together.  He is quick to hug and tell us he loves us.

I still work at Blue Ridge Peds, and they all were on deck to help us when I had to run and get Andrew the other day when he could not see well or hardly walk.  It brought tears to see them with the wheelchair to get him, but also that they made him feel like a celebrity and not one bit bad or scared.  Before we left, almost everyone had checked on Andrew and me.  They are a great group of caring people.  We are certainly blessed with them.

Our family is so thankful for all of the wonderful friends and family God has given to us.  We wish you a Merry Christmas and hope it's the best and most meaningful yet!

Tough day...again

Today has been tough, and I am glad it’s almost time for Shark Tank!  It is rainy here and dreary, but that gives me a sense of peace tonight.  I am tired and weary.  I am frustrated and disappointed.  But most of all, I am thankful; and I have to let those feelings win.  Because even though it was tough, there were so many people helping and so many blessings.

Andrew woke up a little out of it.  He said he had trouble going to sleep and did not sleep well.  But he fell asleep two times on the way to take Sam and then for me to drop him off.  We had worked out our schedules so I could leave to go to “The Lodge” today with the girls.  Hence, the disappointment that I could not go after what happened.  I know I needed the break and the girl time and the sister time.  But I know that the bigger picture is the bigger picture.  And my sweet girls have already made some plans a little later for us, so it immediately gives me something fun to look to.

Anyway, I try not to bug Andrew, but I told him to call me if he felt bad or weird.  He had a paper to turn in, and he had a presentation.  He seemed worn out, but I decided not to worry but to watch my phone closely in case he called.  He did call.  He was talking slowly and with much effort.  He said he was feeling weird, almost like a drunk person looks.  He said that he had some double vision and could not read words off his computer.  Then he said it was weird, but his legs were not working very well.  He thought he would just take a nap before class.  I told him I would be right there.  By the time I got to him, he was not slurring his words but almost.  He was walking like Frankenstein, very jerky and trying very hard, too hard.  I hurried him right to the doctor’s office.  My sweet nurse friends took him up to the office in a wheelchair where his talking became stuttering.  They were assessing him while rolling him in, and I had run to park my car.

In the office, his blood pressure was high.  He could barely walk, and his double vision would come and go.  But he was still being a pleasant patient and smiling and talking, even joking a little, with the nurses.  So his mood was great even though he had a lot going on.

After labs and his blood pressure coming down on its own, Dr. Adams determined that he could leave.  His walking was improving at that point too.  Dr. Adams told Andrew he may have been trying to have a seizure when everything went into slow motion and confusion and his legs would not work.  But he said if it was that, it was good that it did not turn all the way into one.  And we have to look at any positive we can get!
We went to campus and printed his paper and turned it in and went to his presentation.  I was, of course, staying in the background.  At that point, I could barely keep up with him; and he was getting a little bit grumpy.  He was determined to go help at the track meet, but I told him he would not like it if something happened.  So he agreed to come home and rest.  He was worn out by then anyway.  The turnaround, though, had been amazing to watch.

His neurologist is out of town, but the one on call told Dr. Adams to tell us to watch him and call if anything else happened.  We are praying nothing does!

I know what made a huge difference today was what surrounded me.  There were so many friends who were encouraging and concerned and helpful.  They just kind of took over and quietly helped.  It made things so much easier.  And the calls and texts I got from the girls helped a lot too.  I knew people were praying for him.

We had dinner here last night, and we had six college guys and two high school guys eating.  When all of the college guys disappeared, we found them in Sam's room looking at his Legos.  Sam cannot wait for them to come back and see his Playmobil people too.  It was so nice to have them here, and we will start doing it more often.  Andrew had a good night with friends, and I am glad it was last night and not messed up by today.

Sam came home from school over 400 even though he had good numbers throughout the day.  I think he is back to a good place now.  I just always worry that strep has crept in when those numbers pop up unexpectedly!

Please pray for Andrew as he studies for exams.  He has worked so hard this semester, and he needs his brain to cooperate.  We keep praying these seizures go away and stay away.
And I am going to focus on being thankful.  I still think it’s a good idea to watch my sad movies that make me cry – just so the tears don’t come out as meanness later on!   And I know that God knows all about my fears and frustrations.  I came across this verse again this week.  Mrs. Thrasher gave it to me years ago:

“You keep track of all my sorrows.  You have collected all my tears in your bottle.
    You have recorded each one in your book.”  Psalm 56:8

He knows how I feel, and He cares.  He collects all my tears, and this is important to Him because He loves us.

Thanks for praying.