"We bring the sacrifice of praise into the house of the Lord. We bring the sacrifice of praise into the house of the Lord. And we offer up to You, the sacrifices of thanksgiving. And we offer up to you, the sacrifices of praise." I remember singing this song a lot in church. But I really did not know what the sacrifice part meant - at all.
A lot of times we think of a sacrifice as something in the Old Testament or something we give up. The sacrifice of praise that I saw so clearly was when Steven Curtis Chapman sang on the lawn of the Biltmore House just mere months after the tragic accident that took his youngest daughter. Not only that, but his precious son was driving the car involved in the accident. He was not only grieving the physical loss of a child but also for his son dealing with the accident.
He came out (with his two sons) and sang "Blessed Be the Name of the Lord", and his voice cracked on the "You give and take away" part. I had tears streaming down my face. For the next couple of hours, he talked and sang and honestly told us how he felt in the dark days - and that he knew he could never ever sing again. But there he was, praising God in the midst of one of the hardest storms ever in life. And it was like water washing over my soul - literally. And I need that again - not from Steven Curtis Chapman - but from God. He allowed God to continue to use him to show and tell people about what God has done for him and his family - especially now - and he had a testimony before. He had just lost so much but was praising God in a real way that only could come from unbearable pain.
When we can't count on anything in this world - circumstances, people, etc. - God is always there. He never moves. He never leaves us. In the great times, He rejoices with us. In the dark times, He holds our hands. When we cannot go on, He carries us. He sends people to help us - sometimes people we know and sometimes people we don't. He sends us letters in the mail or leaves messages for us where we will surely find them. He whispers to us through His word or speaks to us through a song on the radio. Sometimes we don't see what He has for us so clearly, and sometimes it's so clear that we cannot even believe it.
I know this, and yet in my everyday life, I let things bother me that should not even get a second thought or glance from me. I have too many important things to tend to and too many important things to praise God for.
Today as I talked to my mom on the phone (who called early because she woke up with Sam on her mind and wanted to check on him) and then one of my friends, I was reminded that I need to keep my eyes on Him. When I take them off, I get way off track - quickly. I reread Psalm 13 in my Bible that is clearly marked with the date of September 21, 2009 - the day after Sam's diagnosis. Reverend and Mrs. Thrasher called and prayed for my baby while I held onto his foot. And in about five minutes they threw so many verses and truths into my troubled heart and brain that I could feel peace washing over me. I had to let it. I had not let myself totally break down, and it was not going to be good. I was on auto pilot. I stayed there for a long time and had been on that for other things Irealized later. So when I turned off the auto pilot, I was quite overwhelmed. But in those six verses, like Rev. Thrasher told me, David asked God why He had left him in despair and then thanked Him at the end for dealing bountifully with him. Sometimes we just need to hang on to His promises and His Word while we are in despair and KNOW that He will get us through. And that will be the end of the wondering. We can concentrate on what is to come - better days.
When we don't have a lot of easy days on this earth, we think we should despair; but it can also make us more eager to be with Him and not tied to things on this earth. And then we start thinking about what we want to take with us - our loved ones and others we don't know. And that should keep us occupied for a while! Now that is something to work towards!
So right now for me, I need to separate from things that I can while working my way closer to Him and His Word. Then I won't be so overly sensitive and worry about what my children are missing out on, etc. I can concentrate on helping them be who they need to be - what He has for them to be- and the rest will come. It's hard because of the way we think in this world, but I know He is working on me.
"Blessed Be Your Name" Matt Redmon
Blessed Be Your Name
In the land that is plentiful
Where Your streams of abundance flow
Blessed be Your name
Blessed Be Your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed Be Your name
Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name
Blessed be Your name
When the sun's shining down on me
When the world's 'all as it should be'
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be Your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name
Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name
You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name
That song was my was my confession, prayer and heart's cry during one of life's tough seasons. When all is stripped away, and there is nothing left to hold onto, then there is joy. Not light-hearted, giggling joy - But the choice to rejoice always. In that act of obedience, I found a God-given heart of gratitude... And each time I turned to him in desperation, asking him to make me joyful, I would find that my blessings were too numerous to count. Blessed be His name! For His glory.
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